I suck at coming up with novel ideas for year-end review (nor do I catalog/recollect events that well). So, I am (again) stealing Yan Chee's idea, which was stolen off Tumblr. Yep.
It's a song-list of sorts, and I'll try to include new songs from this year and how I stumbled upon them, because life's odd discoveries are charming.
1:A song you like with a color in the title
Red & White & Blue & Gold - Aoife O'Donovan
Taken off one of Obama's Spotify playlists (they're as classy as the man is)
2:A song you like with a number in the title
One Last Time - Ariana Grande
One of the her songs which I actually really like, plus it took a whole new meaning after the Manchester bombing, days before her concert
3:A song that reminds you of summertime
Yo Voy Ganao - Systema Solar
FIFA 18's story mode opens with you,the main character playing a 3-on-3 futsal match, in the middle of a Brazilian favela. The best thing from an otherwise unchanged (and thus uninspiring) video game franchise.
4:A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about
Supercut - Lorde
Holding onto the best of memories, as my willing haunt (...too real?)
5:A song that needs to be played LOUD:
The Less I Know The Better - Tame Impala
Funky bass licks, some electronica and a head-bopping goodness.
6:A song that makes you want to dance (disclaimer, I've SO many songs for this spot):
Dessert - Dawin
Spotify listed this as my most played song. Gotta hold my hand up.
7:A song to drive to:
Slide - Calvin Harris, Frank Ocean, Migos
Arguably the summer tune to play when travelling anywhere
8:A song about drugs or alcohol
Brandy (You're a Fine Girl) - Looking Glass
Well, it's about a girl, who pours whisky down, end of. Also, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 opener.
9:A song that makes you happy
Birds and the Bees - Dwilly feat. Kyle Thornton
Upbeat Jazz tune recommended by BFM's Take Five music segment.
10:A song that makes you sad
Un anno d'amore (C'est irreparable) - Mina
Of torn dualities, and Master of None Season 2 making me feel too much, for a comedy show.
11:A song that you never get tired of
Good Girls - LANY
A bit of 80s good dance influence, with a catchy tune.
12:A song from your preteen years
I'm Not Okay (I Promise) - My Chemical Romance
Self-explanatory.
13:One of your favorite 80’s songs (had to cheat for this one)
Under Pressure - Queen & David Bowie
Always played after a long day at work. I blame it on Scrubs.
14:A song that you would love played at your wedding
I Found My Everything - Mary J. Blige
I blame the lovely Obamas. Another one from their playlist.
15:A song that is a cover by another artist
Never Gonna Give You Up - Scott Bradlee's Postmodern Jukebox
YOU JUST GOT RICK-ROLLED! Side note, Postmodern Jukebox is awesome.
16:One of your favorite classical songs:
Variations On Canon - Kyle Landry
Something more current, and self-explanatory.
17:A song that you would sing a duet with on karaoke:
Perfect - Ed Sheeran
Seriously, who doesn't love perpetually-drunk Rupert Grint? Jokes. You're great, Ed.
18:A song from the year that you were born (had to cheat for this one, too)
I'd Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That) - Meatloaf
Too real.
19:A song that makes you think about life
Sign of the Times - Harry Styles
One of my surprise albums of the year (because it's gooooood).
20:A song that has many meanings to you
China (The Industrial Era) - Geoff Knorr
To the most complete video game/boardgame mix, Sid Meier's Civilization VI.
21:A favorite song with a person’s name in the title
Kanye (Louis The Child Remix) - The Chainsmokers, sirenXX
Yep. None of that ramble-laden songs with words that conveniently rhyme with one another (I'm looking at you, Closer feat. Halsey).
22:A song that moves you forward
Places to Go - Yuna
Place to see, people to meet, stories to remember.
23:A song that you think everybody should listen to
Something About Us - Balance & The Travelling Sounds
Yeah. Daft Punk actually had meaningful lyrics in their incredible Discovery album.
24:A song by a band you wish were still together
If I Didn't Know Better (Live at Eddie's Attic) - The Civil Wars
A raw, and powerful performance from the duet.
25:A song by an artist no longer living
Mr. Magic (Through The Smoke) - Amy Winehouse
Misunderstood and under-appreciated for her time. Such a loss.
26:A song that makes you want to fall in love
Dying to Start Again - Lovelife
... Yep.
27:A song that breaks your heart
How Do You Mend a Broken Heart - Al Green
Thanks, Obama.
28:A song by an artist with a voice that you love
New York City - Lenny Kravitz
He's just oozing with cool.
29:A song that you like from a TV show
Main Theme - Mr. Robot
*cue Techno thriller music*.
30:A song that reminds you of yourself
Crave You - Giselle, Flight Facilities
Daniella Andrade does a good cover, too.
So many songs, not enough questions.
Sunday, 31 December 2017
Wednesday, 20 December 2017
Whim
I can't do with spontaneity most of the time: it's inefficient. It seldom works. It wastes my time.
I can't afford unnecessary things.
I micromanage my weekends and off-days because that's all the time I can afford to be in the company and service of others. It's my commitment to myself, and to my friends that I'm engaged with them at the present moment.
If I'm not fully engaged, or if that allocation goes to waste, then it's a non-refundable block of time I could have shared with someone else.
Maybe I just don't like the lack of thought put into ideas. That "being spontaneous" is an excuse to churn out half-baked, non-committal promises that one day, a poorly thought-out plan can actually work.
Until that day, I'm going to assume all (your) off-the-cuff plans suck. Especially if you had done absolutely zero research on the very thing you want to do.
I can't afford unnecessary things.
I micromanage my weekends and off-days because that's all the time I can afford to be in the company and service of others. It's my commitment to myself, and to my friends that I'm engaged with them at the present moment.
If I'm not fully engaged, or if that allocation goes to waste, then it's a non-refundable block of time I could have shared with someone else.
Maybe I just don't like the lack of thought put into ideas. That "being spontaneous" is an excuse to churn out half-baked, non-committal promises that one day, a poorly thought-out plan can actually work.
Until that day, I'm going to assume all (your) off-the-cuff plans suck. Especially if you had done absolutely zero research on the very thing you want to do.
posted from Bloggeroid
Saturday, 9 December 2017
Panda
Hey... so... kinda a bit of a ramble here because it's slightly controversial.
I think Pandas, as cute as they are, should just not be bothered with.
Yeah, they're adorable. Yes, it's a protected animal.
But hear me out, those things are now so far detached from the wilderness that it's domesticated. It's no more than a house cat.
They're so clumsy, so expensive to take care of, and demand such a specific (and energy-inefficient) diet of bamboo shoots that it's a far cry from what you would normally define as a bear.
If you put them out in the wilderness, they will perish. And hey, we should save cost and leave them to die. They have nothing to contribute to civilization aside from being a unique token animal.
There. That's my two cents. Come at me.
Sidenote, I'm 2/3 of the way to finishing my Sidisi, Brood Tyrant Commander deck for Magic: The Gathering (yeah, geeky me), so that's exciting.
Also, I got a book over the Big Bad Wolf book sale so hopefully I'll read it.
Oh, and I should really, really either complete the plethora of my video games, or finish editing my book.
Aguanile - Marc Anthony
Thursday, 23 November 2017
Dreams
So... I went on my first date last weekend. That's... Mind-boggling. But anyway, it was not meant to be since there was a blatant lack of chemistry.
Either way, she was leaving for East Malaysia for good in a month's time so it wasn't a viable situation.
And as Sabr aptly puts it, I'm a lover boy: constantly swooning over someone else, usually out of reach (for a killer combo of logistical and emotional reasons).
So until the next date (whenever that may be), I guess I'm an acquaintance or a friend. And nothing more.
It's pretty frustrating to be a realist while still succumbing to the delusions of naive love.
For my wellbeing, I should stop dreaming of you. It's also concerning that I said "should" instead of "need to".
Either way, she was leaving for East Malaysia for good in a month's time so it wasn't a viable situation.
And as Sabr aptly puts it, I'm a lover boy: constantly swooning over someone else, usually out of reach (for a killer combo of logistical and emotional reasons).
So until the next date (whenever that may be), I guess I'm an acquaintance or a friend. And nothing more.
It's pretty frustrating to be a realist while still succumbing to the delusions of naive love.
For my wellbeing, I should stop dreaming of you. It's also concerning that I said "should" instead of "need to".
posted from Bloggeroid
Monday, 30 October 2017
Frayed
I had a sudden urge to run. This upcoming company audit has made work extra shitty this week and I needed to distract myself.
And so I laced up, added the most bass-driven hip-hop/rap tunes I could think of to my running playlist, and took off. I didn't even bother timing myself.
What a fuck up that was.
Ten minutes. That's how long I lasted before the music melted away and the floodgates in my mind broke open.
My mind was finally unbound, ideas burgeoning without restraint, now inexorable because I had broken the lock.
I couldn't stop. Thoughts swirled in my head as though my body was a husk with someone else piloting it, racing through my personal psychoanalysis of recent dreams, to my dating life, to my floundering career, whelming my mind as I realized the horrors of what I have locked up.
I never thought that video games and TV shows had such a profound effect in limiting my mental capacity to conjure up all these notions. Escapism has its merits, but isn't this all just illusionary? How long can I stanch this stream of consciousness with pop culture references and in-game micro-management?
Running didn't take my mind off my problems as much as it revealed the real issues buried deeper within me.
Oh, no.
It had only compensated my physical wellbeing for my mental health.
And so I laced up, added the most bass-driven hip-hop/rap tunes I could think of to my running playlist, and took off. I didn't even bother timing myself.
What a fuck up that was.
Ten minutes. That's how long I lasted before the music melted away and the floodgates in my mind broke open.
My mind was finally unbound, ideas burgeoning without restraint, now inexorable because I had broken the lock.
I couldn't stop. Thoughts swirled in my head as though my body was a husk with someone else piloting it, racing through my personal psychoanalysis of recent dreams, to my dating life, to my floundering career, whelming my mind as I realized the horrors of what I have locked up.
I never thought that video games and TV shows had such a profound effect in limiting my mental capacity to conjure up all these notions. Escapism has its merits, but isn't this all just illusionary? How long can I stanch this stream of consciousness with pop culture references and in-game micro-management?
Running didn't take my mind off my problems as much as it revealed the real issues buried deeper within me.
Oh, no.
It had only compensated my physical wellbeing for my mental health.
posted from Bloggeroid
Sunday, 8 October 2017
(Un)fazed
The resistance period is waning. I feel the adrenaline starting to lose effect, as a wave of exhaustion sweeps by.
This facade of a stoic, calm and collected 24-year old grandson is falling apart.
My maternal grandmother was recently admitted to the hospital for a minor stroke. She's back at home now, but the left side of her face is partially paralysed and her speech is slurred.
She's been doing some regular physiotherapy by walking with a stroller to and fro the toilet, but she needs a feeding tube to make sure food doesn't enter her windpipe instead.
At least she still has her sense of humour. I still have my grandmother, as selfish as that sounds.
My dad's still cracking jokes with grandma, as he rained glowing reviews while she worked on her physiotherapy earlier this evening. How he manages to find the bright side of optimism in a sombre setting astounds me.
Just a few minutes ago, my mom, together with the help of my (fresh grad) doctor cousin, just fixed grandma's feeding tube in place as she subconsciously tried to yank it out for the second time today. This is the first time in her life that my mom's doing this and she's unfazed.
I've the hardest fucking parents in the world, and I'm extremely proud to be their son. I just pray that I'll have the mental strength and fortitude to do them right when the moment requires me to step up.
Right now, my usual borderline-sociopathic ability to seamlessly disassociate with reality has been subdued. I am a shadow of myself, sitting in the kitchen alone, breaking apart inside.
This facade of a stoic, calm and collected 24-year old grandson is falling apart.
My maternal grandmother was recently admitted to the hospital for a minor stroke. She's back at home now, but the left side of her face is partially paralysed and her speech is slurred.
She's been doing some regular physiotherapy by walking with a stroller to and fro the toilet, but she needs a feeding tube to make sure food doesn't enter her windpipe instead.
At least she still has her sense of humour. I still have my grandmother, as selfish as that sounds.
My dad's still cracking jokes with grandma, as he rained glowing reviews while she worked on her physiotherapy earlier this evening. How he manages to find the bright side of optimism in a sombre setting astounds me.
Just a few minutes ago, my mom, together with the help of my (fresh grad) doctor cousin, just fixed grandma's feeding tube in place as she subconsciously tried to yank it out for the second time today. This is the first time in her life that my mom's doing this and she's unfazed.
I've the hardest fucking parents in the world, and I'm extremely proud to be their son. I just pray that I'll have the mental strength and fortitude to do them right when the moment requires me to step up.
Right now, my usual borderline-sociopathic ability to seamlessly disassociate with reality has been subdued. I am a shadow of myself, sitting in the kitchen alone, breaking apart inside.
posted from Bloggeroid
Wednesday, 4 October 2017
Rage
First of all, I'm emotionally all over the place. I'm angry. Angry at what my nation could do, and I mean the amount of evil we have the capacity for. So yeah, I'm going into this without pulling any punches.
To lend some context, I just heard BFM's interview with The Star's youth platform-turned investigative journalism team R.AGE, regarding their piece on the student trafficking of foreign students.
Long story short, these bright, hopeful individuals are swindled into spending their nest eggs, and even their families's possessions, for the prospects of receiving a good education from bogus institutions set up in Malaysia. Then, on their student visas, they're forced to work with their student visas (which is an immigration crime) to survive, while earning less than the minimum wage, all while their family goes on with their lives unaware of the horrors students face.
It sickens me that Malaysia, a nation of multicultural and ethnic diversity can resort in such exploitative measures. I'm angry at how vulnerable people are exploited just because they want to break out of the poverty cycle.
I'm angry that these shit bag, scamming cunts walk among the rakyat, without receiving justice because these syndicates are so entrenched in the grey area of the law that they can get away unscathed.
I'm angry, because I have been in that position before, albeit I was lucky and privileged enough to get out of the scam. Yeah, I'm priveleged. I've never denied it (and it's besides the point here).
If I wasn't writhing in my car seat listening to this, driving home from work, then I might just be weeping in the corner of my room for thinking how cruel the world is at exploiting the poor and underprivileged.
I know I'm angry because of my passion for being social justice-y at the slightest of things. But the root of the problem is how I don't know how to redirect that anger into something useful.
How the fuck do we solve these issues? I'm not willing to put my career on hold to address these atrocities, either.
Maybe that's the cost I'm not willing to bear. Maybe the toll isn't just my ideals and values, but my lifetime as well...
To lend some context, I just heard BFM's interview with The Star's youth platform-turned investigative journalism team R.AGE, regarding their piece on the student trafficking of foreign students.
Long story short, these bright, hopeful individuals are swindled into spending their nest eggs, and even their families's possessions, for the prospects of receiving a good education from bogus institutions set up in Malaysia. Then, on their student visas, they're forced to work with their student visas (which is an immigration crime) to survive, while earning less than the minimum wage, all while their family goes on with their lives unaware of the horrors students face.
It sickens me that Malaysia, a nation of multicultural and ethnic diversity can resort in such exploitative measures. I'm angry at how vulnerable people are exploited just because they want to break out of the poverty cycle.
I'm angry that these shit bag, scamming cunts walk among the rakyat, without receiving justice because these syndicates are so entrenched in the grey area of the law that they can get away unscathed.
I'm angry, because I have been in that position before, albeit I was lucky and privileged enough to get out of the scam. Yeah, I'm priveleged. I've never denied it (and it's besides the point here).
If I wasn't writhing in my car seat listening to this, driving home from work, then I might just be weeping in the corner of my room for thinking how cruel the world is at exploiting the poor and underprivileged.
I know I'm angry because of my passion for being social justice-y at the slightest of things. But the root of the problem is how I don't know how to redirect that anger into something useful.
How the fuck do we solve these issues? I'm not willing to put my career on hold to address these atrocities, either.
Maybe that's the cost I'm not willing to bear. Maybe the toll isn't just my ideals and values, but my lifetime as well...
posted from Bloggeroid
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