Go/no go

"No seat belts?'

I shuffle in my seat, in what I used to call a van. Now it's a deathtrap for six. Five of which I care more (sorry, driver Chong).

I take a sniff of my clothes. A faint scent of vanilla on cotton. Good, I thought. Certainly doesn't reflect the past half hour of me running around the house, packing up for this trip.

Yeah. I'm going back to Iowa, for my Liang's graduation. And like I was three years ago, I've no plans nor ideas of what I'll do there.

My connection with the United States is odd, really. I love the people I've met there, and yet I loathe the nation it has become since my absence (no correlation there).

But yet again, here I am, about to meet lady liberty again. This time, for real. Yep. We're stopping by NYC.

I'm glad I got to take a nice break from life. I'm even more excited to see the people who are still around the area. And I'm anxious to unpack the last three years of my life to them.

I just hope they feel the same way.

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Print

It's near. I'm finally about to print the first copies of my book to be secretly sent to some awesome people stateside. Why them?

Because I'll be there in a few day's time. Liang's graduating so we're going to Des Moines before heading to Boston and New York City.

So I'll be rushing to get all my errands sorted out on Wednesday, before heading to the airport post-dinner. I'll need to print my book, head to Sentul to get US SIM cards from Yu Liang (who's on his way back from the US), and collect the printed and binded books, all while having packed already.

I have only packed two shirts for our two-week trip.

Not gonna lie, it's exciting to be able to go back. But I've been engrossed in everyday life in a drone-esque job so much that it had only hit me last Saturday that I'm flying off.

Besides that, it was a huge moment last week, to have been able to cast my vote for the first time in General Election 14. And also, ultimately being part of history. 60 years under the governance of a single party has come to an end.

The Opposition party had won. It's a bittersweet moment, because the candidates are basically the 2017 US Presidential Elections all over again. My voting practice was extremely (and woefully) straightforward: just not them.

Who did I want to vote for? Not the same people as before. What policies should we adopt? Not the ones implemented previously.

I hope to be a better voter and a more informed citizen the next time I get to exercise my right to vote.

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Bisection

*Last message sent: one year ago*

That struck a nerve with me.

Has it really been that long? Time has been cruel, but so have I.

I've forgotten about you. I've moved on, whether onto better things, is ultimately up for debate.

But when did I actually start giving up? More importantly, _how_ could I have given up?

You were my best friend. Frankly, you still are.

But it's been one year since you read my messages. And it's been two years since we last spoke to each other.

I don't know what to feel about that. Can you tell me how?

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